Now it’s January 2, 2009, and did I really manifest that $100,000+ before December 31st, 2009? Um, no I did not. Now I am sitting here thinking why didn’t I see the results I asked for. Looking back, I can only laugh at myself because all what I asked for have manifested itself into a life situation in which I had a choice to how to handle it. Either I could choose to let fear hold me or faith release me. Those moments in 2009 where I became filled with fear, anxiety, and what ifs was the very moment in which I could have taken to get to my next step of earning a six figure income. 2009 was clearly my designed destiny because I AM the CHOOSER. “Ironically” today I was on a Beyond Discovery call with motivator Sam Crowley and he was speaking on many facets but, the two that stood out to me the most was the topics on fear and distractions. Those moments of fear for pushing forth with my dream normally involved speaking about my vision, what I wanted, how I felt, and speaking up, towards random people who were subconsciously placed in front of me at that very moment in time for me to approach me from the eyes of the other. Deep down inside I heard my inner voice cry out just do it, and my outer voice (ego) was hyped and saying okay I will but my body wasn’t moving! And before I knew it the opportunity was missed, again! I had so many missed opportunities in 2009 because I chose to have my outer voice (ego) keep me in my comfortable zone. I had a conscious year of seeing myself from a higher perspective, learning, feeling my fear, and my biggest distractions. So, another reason why I didn’t manifest my hearty $100,000+ was because I was DISTRACTED. My distractions was pleasing but, not fulfilling my goal’s purpose. I was distracted from my bliss. 2009 was very satisfying, but I really allowed myself to live so spontaneously throughout my day that it took away my time of making my dream a reality. When I did take the time out to write I also had my phone on, the computer up and running, the radio on, or some other distractions. Instead of being in complete focus on putting my thoughts on paper, it was always something else I could have be doing. Oh yes, one of my favorite phrase I told myself was ‘ah, I’ll do it tomorrow!’. (Shaking my head). It was not only the $100,000+ that wasn’t manifested; it was other dreams as well. I truly believed that I was going to manifested it. Wow, as I was just typing those words, I felt a turning in my body because, I really do not think I truly believed it. Yes, 2009 I realized how many doubts, fears, non deserving, and unworthy emotions I flooded my mind with. Also, these limited emotions were trapped inside the cells of my temple. These restricting emotions lived inside of me that birthed out life circumstances that challenged my continuing circle of fear. Hm, success comes from within. Since, I didn’t feel and believed I was successful from deep within then of course silly, my physical life matched up to that! EVERYTHING is solidified by the very emotions that we feel. I clearly understand that now. One gift that I gave to myself was FORGIVENESS. I do not regret anything, or feel guilty about not seeing the results that I told myself I will have. All things happened for a reason and I have more insight about that now. Now, I am living on the basics of what I DID DO versus what I SHOULD DO. Here it is 2010, a new decade. I see with new eyes. I feel intuitively. I am therefore it is. The only person that led me astray from flowering my vision is….yup, me, myself, and I. No more games I shall play with myself, but to really stand and be in my power. I thought 2009 was a powerful year; I can’t wait to see what my daily gratitude brings me in 2010. Oh yes, the $100,000 is surely still my goal to become elegantly placed in my bank account with grace. I give thanks =) Oh yes, you who are reading this: NO FEAR or DISTRACTIONS..FREEDOM…Live your dreams!
